Keys

Captain's blog, stardate 2653.5...
Time for an amusing story. By which I mean amusing to people who are not me because I do not find this story amusing in the slightest.
So this evening I eventually decided to make myself some supper, which is Elizabeth-language for "spread hummus on a slice of pita bread and eat it". This was accomplished without much ado. However, when I went back to my room after finishing my "meal", a slight problem presented itself. As you might have already guessed from the title of this post, said problem was that my keys had vanished.
Now, I have two keys on my keyring. One opens the door to my room, which locks itself automatically when closed. The other opens the lock to my cupboard in the kitchen, where my utensils, plates/bowls/cups, and dry food is stored. So without my keys I can do pretty much nothing.
Understandably this was quite distressing to me so I ran around looking in all the places where I could concievably have left my keys while in the process of getting my food. Purse? No. Refrigerator? No. Countertop? No. Garbage Can Where I Threw Away One Small Piece Of Plastic? No. At this point the only place I could think of that I hadn't checked was inside the cupboard. Which I had already locked.
I then proceeded to do the following:
1) Try to cut the lock with scissors (this obviously failed)
2) Run downstairs and borrow the spare key to my room from the front desk
3) Desperately search my room (split infinitives! Yay!) for a spare key to the cupboard lock, which I seemed to recall having.
4) Fail to find the cupboard key and despondently return my room key.
5) Remember where I put the cupboard key, rush downstairs, borrow the room key again, and take the cupboard key out of my room.
6) Open the cupboard, only to discover...my keyring is not inside!
7) Pray desperately that I will remember someplace my keys could possibly be, since they're obviously not anywhere I could possibly have left them.
8) Search everywhere again, including desperately checking inside pots I never touched to see if someone could have hidden them.
9) Discover my keys! Where were they so cleverly hidden from sight?

...In my jeans pocket, of course. Where I had put my keys on several other occasions and never forgotten to look.

And thus I prove my complete and utter lack of common sense for the 2,718,281st time. I feel like I'm on some bad sitcom or something but am still not deriving any amusement out of this.

However, in good news, I'm listening to the Star Trek: The Motion Picture theme, which is definitely one of my favorite pieces of music ever written, and definitely the best part of the movie. (The second-best part of the movie was that it showed some very pretty shots of the Enterprise accompanied with the majestic music. The third best part of the movie was that it said "Star Trek" in the title. The fourth best part was that it ended.)